This is not my first foray into attempting to be more joyful, I know it won't be my last, but it is nonetheless one of the HARDEST things I've ever had to do. Mainly because though try as I might to remain chill and choose joy...everybody seems out to harsh my mellow (if ya get my drift)!! Also everything that can go wrong ultimately WILL GO WRONG when one desires to emulate the beauty of the joy of the Lord. I'm afraid I am far less joyful than I would've hoped to be as I find myself at the end of this month... in other words, as one who is a beloved part of the body of Christ right now I am the stinky armpit in need of some serious Holy Spirit deodorizing. Maybe it is the constant reminder to keep focusing on Joy this month that is throwing me off?? Cause... usually I would categorize myself as a happy, joyful, peace loving, easy going kind of person. My merry Dr.Jekyll has been replaced by moody Mr. Hyde (more like HIDE far FAR away from her at the moment according to my family). The truth is life is no more stressful than usual, my family no less trying or my health more unhealthy than usual. If I'm being honest it really comes down to a heart matter, my Scripture reading and prayer time haven't been as consistent as it should be. I haven't been following my eating routine, vitamins, exercise ext. properly so I haven't had as much energy to spare. I haven't been as mindful of things I am thankful for. Sometimes I sit down and write a list of 10 reasons to rejoice, or things I am grateful for but I haven't made time for it lately... Neglect is a great thief of Joy. I am learning it is so much more than just trying to make myself feel joyful, or think happy thoughts, after all I'm not Peter Pan for goodness sakes! Joy is supposed to be a much deeper value, and its source is ultimately from the Lord, He is the beginning and end of it and if He never fails, never runs dry, never tiers or withholds any good thing from us so too our joy can be without end. The key is coming back to the well of who He is and staying close so when I get even a little bit empty He can fill me right back up. This has been a challenging month to mentally stay focused on joy and I wouldn't say I achieved it quite as much as I had hoped but the pursuit, and the endeavor was worth it and I will continue to look for it, help joy grow and try to spread joy whenever and wherever I can. As the good book says, "The joy of the LORD is your strength." Nehemiah 8:10